black abyss

My hormones are definitely kicking in as I tried to stop myself from reading my old entries, but failed.  The entries that people say I wrote beautifully about, about my broken heart, about my love tragedy.  And I tried to stop myself from crying, but instead the tears fall.


I'd like to think that I have picked myself up and doing pretty okay on making myself happy.  I'd like to think that I have managed to be a better person by being a friend now to him.  I'd like to think that despite my broken heart and broken self, there will be someone out there who will care for me.


I have stopped counting how long ago it was that I fell down hard on my face.  But the dreams do not stop occurring.  And 99% of the time I am doing great.  But tonight's not the night.  


To my lovely friends who have always been there for me, I miss all of you.  Truly and dearly.  Very much so.  


XOXO