Thursday, October 29, 2009

Day 96

It hurts to see him travel to a place he had once promised to take me to, with people I have reasons to believe that he'll end up with, and wearing what I recently gave him.

And this is the reason that you're so busy that you can't even spend 10 minutes sending me back my dress?

Screw you.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Day 87

Weeds are very strong living things.  Its roots run so deep and grow in every imaginable direction.  You pull it out, thinking that you have removed it but ultimately, there's enough left behind that it thrives and grows again. 

On most days I can push memories of you aside and convince myself that it's for the better.  Fact is you have molded and shaped the person I have become and the experience I have as a person.  And that is not something I can push aside because I continue to dream about you and think about you unconsciously.  Removing you on the surface is only a temporary solution.  Your roots in me are far too deep, far too widespread.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Day 77

I am feeling lost.  I'd very much like to think that one day I'll be successful in my career or be happy with the man of my life.  For a long time, I was very content having one over the other and was okay about the other not quite working out.  But now that I have neither, it makes me wonder how much do I know myself and how much do I want things in my life.  If I really want to be successful, shouldn't that motivate me to pursue it?  Where is the drive in me?

When you left me standing there alone in the dark, you forgot to leave me a torchlight