Day 5

Against all better judgment, I asked to see him. I went to see him.

I could not look at his face. Could not look into his eyes. Could not believe that it's truly ended.

Day 4

Not sure whether it is wise or not to be heading over to where he is now...

*edit*

For the first time he is not there to pick me up from the airport =(

happy birthday to myself

Day 3

Really do not understand why people keep telling me that he may be joking or keep asking me whether there's any chance of patching up.

Seriously. Do you think that him breaking up with me happened in only a few words?

Day 2

Can't sleep can't eat much

Day 1

Trying to come to terms with the fact that the person I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with has announced that he does not see that happening anymore.

extraordinarily difficult

watching Grey's has a definite effect of turning on the waterworks and for the past week, everything has just been extraordinarily difficult...

after spending 2 weeks with mr. boyfriend, being apart has been extraordinarily difficult. we didn't spend much quality time together since it was his family trip but i got used to going to bed and waking up in the same room as him. i got used to eating my meals with him and i got used to being able to steal that kiss or steal that hug from him and vice versa. i got used to him just being around. being back in KL is just damnit suffering...and i really wonder how much longer can i take this? it's been only a year...

after suffering from lots of neck/shoulder pain and migraine since the car accident in march, i have finally found the time and effort to make the travel to mont kiara to see a chiropracter. turns out that i have a pretty serious neck injury that has caused the natural neck curvature to straighten out.

normal neck curvatureabnormal neck curvature (i.e. mine)

my skull is not sitting properly on top of my spine and therefore my muscles are working extra hard to pull my head to the right position, hence the pain. oh, and my spinal/neck bones may also be touching my spinal cord, thus affecting the nerves as well. just great. i had my first physiotherapy treatment to bring down the swellings and i was sore the whole night. then i have to continue physiotherapy twice a week before the doctor uses a posture pump to "push" my neck back to its curvature. this is extraordinarily difficult, not just the pain and the possibility of suffering for the rest of my life, but also the sad fact that i really do not have the time as a consultant to fix this...then it makes me wonder if it's at all worth it to work the long hours if i can't even make time to see doctors. is it?

there's also my housing situation that i need to fix...and my sore eye...the pressure to get braces...the list goes on.

i am feeling terribly lonely...there's not many friends in KL and mr. boyfriend is 4 hours and rm1000 away =(.

extraordinarily hard...